Day 36.

Miss me much?  Its been 3 months to the day. That is definitely a crazy coincidence. I got on here to blog last month, and actually had written the greater part of a post, but then never finished.  So here I am on February 5th, at 12:35 am writing for the first time in three months.
I have few intentions for this post. I want so badly to blog with greatness and do so routinely, but I struggle trying to think of things to write.  I don't want to bore you with what I made for dinner, or who I talked to, and so instead I say nothing. And I do sincerely apologize.

At the risk of sounding cliché, I share the following thoughts with you.
Within each of us exists the innate desire to be wanted. To be loved. We search for someone to complete that block of Maslow's pyramid.  And yet we put our emotional selves in harms way to find a person who can do that for us. We are the ones who allow ourselves to be hurt, we make our hearts vulnerable. We forget about that natural instinct to protect ourselves; we deny all logic.
We are beat. We create opportunities to be bruised and battered. And some of us foolishly do so time and time again.
And yet we continue.  We lose control of our emotions.  We lose our cool.

And despite the chaos and turmoil to be found, despite the billions of individuals that exist on the face of the planet, two people find a place of solace -- those same individuals who wished to be wanted are contented.


Happiness can be achieved without being loved romantically.  I know I am as happy today as I choose to be. It is just a very odd, very illogical, desire to contemplate.  I of all people can readily admit that I fall weak inside often. I throw my heart out for the lions of this emotional world to shred and devour.  At times I wonder if I can recover from the emotional damage I have subjected myself to.  I can.  In those moments of torture, it is hard to see any further than that hour, that moment, that night, but in the long haul, everything is wonderful.  Maybe the statistically improbable will happen and you will find love. And maybe it won't.  But thats ok.  We all want to be wanted.  To be loved.  You want to be wanted. You and 7 billion other people. Remember. You and 7 billion people.




Listening to: Joshua Radin
Glad to be alive: because why not?
Day of the Year: 36